We talked about a lot of things, but we never had the best communication when it came to emotions.  I know, on occasion, I hurt you or you felt judged by me.  I wanted to say sorry.  The lack of communication when it came to our feelings was our biggest flaw, not just yours or mine, but us as friends.  I’m sorry for my share.  Truly, I am.

I understand why you cut off communication with everyone after high school.  I was surprised at first but then I thought about it and it made sense, even if I didn’t know all your reasons.  You’ve always been very sensitive and I suppose you wanted to start over fresh.  But if there were any resentments in the decision, I wanted to apologize for my part of things.  I think we were both in positions to hurt each other sometimes, and we never opened up enough to work out what needed to be worked out.

As much as I could, I tried to be a good friend.  I made mistakes, but I tried to be faithful in keeping your secrets and just being there.  I hope you’re doing well, wherever you are, and I hope you’re living for yourself and not to please others.  You’re an intelligent, beautiful girl but I know your confidence is easy to bruise.  Just try not to be unfair to yourself — that’s what I worry about most when I think of you.

No matter what anyone says or what you think, you are wonderful.

Be well, my Silly-Oofa.

I did a web search for Catholic churches because I’m trying to design and build a church with a graveyard for my Sims 3 game. It’s mainly for the graveyard aspect (The Sims doesn’t have religion) because Sim ghosts are awesome. I’m having trouble with the steeple (the roof height affects the entire roof, not just one portion, and it’s a big mess), so I thought maybe a different type of church architecture can look like a church but not include a steeple so that I don’t have to just stick an Egyptian obelisk on top and hope my Sims don’t notice the difference.

I came across this post about a guy who coached a Catholic kids team in Chicago and had to go through a program that focused half its efforts on preventing child molestation. Which reminded me of the time I was asked to undergo a background check to be an assistant for a babies’ Bible class.

Most people, when asked, will say “Oh, background checks are a great idea!”

Until they’re asked to submit to one.

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In America, the tendency is to think “Raw fish? Ew!” As a woman who’s been taught to fear raw chicken and raw beef and raw, well, anything, I felt it unlikely that I would enjoy raw fish when a friend suggested we go to our local sushi restaurant.

That was over a year ago, and Alex and I have since bought a “make sushi at home” book and introduced my brother to a local sushi place.

Just today I got a tuna/salmon roll with avacado, five types of caviar, crunchies, and spicy mayo (hold the extra seaweed) for $13 and ate each sweet messy piece with my fingers by stuffing it into my mouth and just savoring (I looked like a moron — it was great).

Here’s the thing my brother and his wife commented on after we introduced them to sushi, something many people neglect when trying to talk others into trying it — one roll can keep you full for hours afterward. Not just full but comfortable. Hours after we’d introduced them to sushi, they told us that they looked at each other and said “I’m still full. But I don’t feel sick, either.” It was the exact same feeling Alex and I noticed after our first time.

That’s the magic of sushi. It’s a feel-good food. It satisfies hunger without leaving you bloated or gross.

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So I wrote something about how people who get scared off of searching for agents because of the economy are stupid…

I’m stupid.

It’s not all the economy. I mean, that started the rollercoaster of discouragement (again, another example of why I HATE listening to other writers — negative, negative, negative! — and it always gets to me!).

That planted the seed of “Then why am I bothering?”

Then I started wondering whether or not my main character is at all compelling. Then I thought up revisions I wanted to make on my second book. Then I thought “Well, if this one doesn’t get picked up (because it won’t because the economy is bad), maybe I can start with the one that comes before it chronologically.” And then I thought “Why am I searching for an agent for this one if I actually want that one to come first? Do I even want it to come first? I have no idea.”

You must keep sending work out; you must never let a manuscript do nothing but eat its head off in a drawer. You send that work out again and again, while you’re working on another one. If you have talent, you will receive some measure of success — but only if you persist. ~Isaac Asimov

To fix this unpleasant state, I’m learning to drive so that I can get some small job to get me out of the house and perhaps get me to the library. In fact, a small job at the library would be lovely, but we’ll see what I can find. Currently, it costs money to park there — parking meters and all — and I can’t make myself work at home. I’m hopeless.

This is not about magic in books versus real religion.  That’s what this post was about.

This is about magic in books versus Christianity in books.

Here’s the thing — Christianity doesn’t like magic. That’s the party line. But magic also doesn’t exist. (Though I’ve said I might believe in ghosts if people weren’t always wrong about them.)

So when I find a fantasy that includes a Christian official as a one-dimensional badguy, I get a little disgruntled. Even if a second religious official is sympathetic to magical powers or beings, it’s usually an all-encompassing acceptance, which is stupid and any sensible Christian would agree. Just because a religious official doesn’t want to burn someone for witchcraft when they show magical powers does not mean he or she will be entirely comfortable or even accepting of the situation. In fact, I’m pretty sure it would freak them out. These are humans you’re designing, not puppets, and something like fantasy meeting traditional Catholicism (which is the most common choice) would very easily cause conflicting feelings in a religious character who isn’t a monster.

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